Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Mar. 31: Who Will You Be "After"?

Have you ever wondered if you will be a "different person" after you finish losing the weight you've set out to lose? I know that we all daydream about how our lives will change - men will think we are beautiful, we'll be able to run a 10K, we'll be able to go into any store and pick something fashionable in a single digit size.

But who will you be inside?

Right now, I often feel like a thin person trapped in a fat body.  I have the healthy habits of a fit person.  I eat carefully, I work out daily, and I focus my energies towards a healthy lifestyle.

But when I lose all that I plan to lose, will I feel like a fat person in a fit body?

Will I still be very shy around people I don't know?  Will I still tend to stay in the background when in a large group?  Will I still be a geek? When a good looking guy flirts with me, will I learn to flirt back or will I still be suspicious of his motives?

I really don't think I have terrible self esteem, although it probably sounds like I do given that last paragraph.  I'm a person who tends to enjoy her own company.  I'm an introspective bookworm.  I'm reasonably presentable, but I'm always shocked when a good-looking guy flirts with me or asks me out.  I consider that realistic, as opposed to sad, because sociological studies confirm most people look for a partner with similar attractiveness and intelligence. 
I sometimes wonder what life will be like when the dieting portion is all said and done.  Will being fit take me so far out of my personal comfort zone that it will be difficult to maintain?

Lots of questions and no answers.....I'll let you know when I get there.

1 comment:

  1. You're right to wonder about the "after" you. I didn't during my journey, and was unprepared for the discovery that post-weight loss I was the same person as before. Fat me was Skinny me. My problems didn't melt away with the pounds, or smooth out with the tightening skin. Whatever I was before I lost weight, I still was afterwards. Size 18 me, Size 0 me... still me. Our internal issues must be dealt with apart from our external ones. You're doing well to recognize that!